Edge

How does it feel, you ask.
Like my thoughts are ganging up against me,
and all they do is taunt and torment me.
Like there is a chasm in my heart,
and all it does is bleed and drip.
Like my muscles are weakened,
and all I can do is lie in bed,
feeling sorry for myself.
Like I’m alone,
even when I’m surrounded by people.
Like every bite of food is gravel against my tongue,
and I can’t stomach anymore.
It feels like I’m in limbo,
where yesterday was gray,
today is tormenting,
and the future bleak.
It feels like no one understands,
or wants to understand.
You’re losing weight, are you dieting? Oh, it’s those instagram models. Don’t let their perfect bodies get into your head
No, I’m not trying to lose weight.
It’s just….
No, you won’t get it.
I let it slide with a plastered smile and a nod,
and let myself weep behind closed doors.
Nobody understands.
What? I’m sorry,
I didn’t catch that.
Yes, I’ve thought of an out.
Gods, I’ve looked at the razor a hundred times,
wanting it against my skin.
I’ve wondered how it would feel to not feel.
If I ended it,
I could be free of the turmoil and pain.
But no.
I can’t summon the energy,
running from my troubles.
Who knows, I could be free of this.
One step at a time, right?
You said that last time.

That’s why I opted for this.

28 Comments

  1. Reblogged this on BOLD News Kenya and commented:
    If you going through Depression you aught to read this poem By Terry so inspiring…. Nd if you mind about your friends I’d recommend you to forward/share widely it great honor and pleasure to live in a world full of ecstasy
    Thank you

    Liked by 1 person

  2. So interesting and sweet, encouraging nd relieving, I just felt a sigh of relief after reading it… Good work Terry 💖💖💖 keep pushing hard for success

    Japheth k Bor
    Via Bold news Kenya

    Like

  3. well sculptured tonnes of emotions full of inbound emotions and numerous sprinkles of perfection… good work girl!!.. this is a must read to the universe…

    # kadogo_yournumberonefan

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Great work @Terry, I love your poems because they are so direct 🎯 on point 😊😊😁Talk on real life events… keep writing 💯

    Liked by 1 person

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